Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate. I will do this dressed anyway you wish or with out clothing if that pleases you.
Hope you enjoy these, or maybe get some inspiration! I am safe and sane ( I know you are questioning that about now)."HOW GREAT IS THAT?!
Here are nine examples of how NOT to word your phone chat welcome message.
"There is a little place in the jumbled sock drawer of my heart where you match up all the pairs, throw out the ones with holes in them, and buy me some of those neat dressy ones with the weird black and red geometrical designs on them." "Angry, simple-minded, balding, partially blind ex-circus flipper boy with a passion for covering lovers in sour cream and gravy seeks exotic, heavily tattooed piercing fanatic, preferably hairy and stinky, either sex, for whippings, bizarre sex and fashion consulting.
We're one of the oldest and best known dating communities on the web, and we have a unique, and very popular, secret weapon - our intelligent two-way matching feature.
Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... I scrub floors, vacum clean bathrooms and kitchens and yes I do windows. "Hey, what's all this crusty gunk clogging up the hose...?
Belligerent old shit (M, 53)" "When not in my London city office overseeing the day-to-day business of my successful accountancy firm, I can be found leaning inside taxi cabs, spitting wild obscenities and challenging the drivers to fisticuffs." Now you’ve seen the funniest dating personal ads on the web, see if you can do better with your own phone dating chat welcome message.
61 - Stockport, Greater Manchester Interesting bass-playing Psychologist seeks new partner I'm articulate, intelligent, fit, attractive - I was recently described as: looking like Steve Mc Queen "from the...
Some willingness to assist with basic bodily functions required." "Bitter, unsuccessful middle aged loser wallowing in an unending sea of inert, drooping loneliness looking for 24 year old needy leech-like hanger-on to abuse with dull stories, tired sex and Herb Alpert albums." "I like eating mayonnaise and peanut butter sandwiches in the rain, watching Barney Miller reruns, peeing on birds in the park and licking strangers on the subway; you eat beets raw, have climbed Kilimanjaro, and sweat freely and often.
Must wear size five shoes." "When I was thirty my dates had to be young, tall, handsome, rich, intelligent.