Similarly, we try to divine as much of that information as possible from the dating profile photo and username even before we start in on the dating profile.This is why you have to take care to understand exactly what your profile is saying to the women who view it.This means sending out more cold e-mails, dealing with more rejections and more dates that go nowhere. It’s part of the price of entry, and it’s better that adjust your expectations accordingly instead of dealing with the slow burn of “WHY WON’T THE MAGICAL BOX PROVIDE ME WITH SEX?” Remember what I said earlier about how we mentally filter people into “attractive” and “not attractive” when we meet them in person?If you’re the sort of person who’s clever and witty, then you want to look more towards a site like OKCupid that lets you display your humor like the tail of an Oscar Wilde-loving peacock.At the same time, you’re less likely to have success when dealing with dating/hook-up apps like Grindr or Tinder. Speaking of the offline dating mindset: you’re going to have to accept that online dating is even more of a numbers game than dating in IRL or meatspace or whatever the cool kids are calling “the world” these days.
Even for people like me who the whole dance and the chase and the thrill of the new, there will be points when you really just want to take a step back from it for a while and catch your breath and let your ego recover from the beatings that tend to come with it. But just as when you’re trying to meet your future snugglebunny the old-fashioned way, it’s important to understand the potential headaches that come with those marathon OKCupid sessions.Many of the things that drive people away from online dating can be headed off at the pass with some preparation.The first step to overcoming your frustration with online dating is to adjust your mindset and expectations accordingly.The lack of non-verbal cues that attract us to others don’t carry across in online dating and, as a result, you’ll occasionally come across people who seem great on paper but who don’t turn you on in person.We can get as righteous as we’d like about “getting to know somebody’s soul” or the purity of meeting people without our hangups about looks, but without that physical component, it’s impossible to guarantee that you’re going to be attracted to somebody in person.